Prayer: from a mother of 2.5 boys

Dear Lord,

Please let the ultrasound tech be wrong and let this next baby…be a girl. Sure, I understand the teenage years will be rough. She’ll probably hate me. I get it. 

But at the same time, she probably won’t…throw strawberries on the kitchen floor and crush them with her bare feet. I doubt she’ll grab a bag of powdered sugar and dump it out all over the same floor, or stuff her hands full of pistachio shells and sprinkle them on her brother’s head…onto the office floor. I doubt she’ll trip her brother on a concrete surface and chip his tooth. And she wouldn’t think to take the last remaining Easter Egg and crush it to bits and dump it all over the (office) floor, too. I’m guessing she wouldn’t disobey me by running through standing water on the aforementioned concrete surface..laughing maniacally as I sternly implore her to stop.

I can only assume she wouldn’t take her brother’s sippy cup from the kitchen and hold it with the spout facing downward – spraying water wherever she went. Or dip her feet in moonsand and walk all over the house leaving a trail of blue dust. Or take her Triscuit crumbs and dump them on the floor right AFTER I finished vacuuming. And, when I insist that she vacuum up said crumbs, she complies only to ‘accidentally spill’ the contents of the filter all over the kitchen floor.

I’m just guessing if this baby was a girl she wouldn’t do any of this…and certainly not in a 2.5 hour span of time.

If it’s not possible for this baby to be a girl, could you double my husband’s salary without increasing his hours? So that we can get a nanny and a cleaning lady and many prescriptions of xanax or whatever it is that people take these days to calm themselves?

And if all this is not possible, please let this baby be me..(minus the temper).


7 thoughts on “Prayer: from a mother of 2.5 boys

  1. wow. to say you have your hands full might be an understatement!

    i was the first born and treated my brother horribly at times and tried to blame him when i mis-behaved.

    then there’s my sister-in-law, who is the youngest born…after 3 boys…and she pretty much acts like a boy.

    so i think…no matter what…you will have your hands full!

  2. Can I just say that I am DYING laughing, but only because I can TRULY relate to this post. I’m tellin ya, I had to guarantee a girl. No taking risks with #3-no sirree. I cleaned up far too much mud, eggs that had been smashed against the wall, went to the ER too many times for foreign injested substances. But, girls bring a whole new element to motherhood. Yesterday, Selah threw a HUGE fit because when she opened her fruit roll up it stck together and she wanted it flat. She threw a one hour long, sounds like I’m abusing her kind of fit. All the while I sat in my room laughing/crying because I had no idea what to do. I knew how to clean up messes!!! But, I don’t know how to handle drama. Sheesh.

  3. Nah, feel free to laugh.Today I think it’s marginally humorous. Yesterday – not so much. It was like some kind of plague of bad behavior came over them….the future is scary.

  4. Yes, there are times when life might feel like a sitcom…sometimes I like to pretend that there are cameras following me (it keeps me from saying too many bad words)…ahhh, this will all one day be just a distant memory. Chin up, friend…you can do it!

  5. I could only just laugh. This sounds so darn familiar and I only have ONE boy! I think whether they are boys or girls, as long as they have a cohort they will FIND trouble!!! Know that there are all these other moms experiencing the same thing 🙂


Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s